It’s been too long, friends.  I’ve been good about updating on instagram and facebook but it’s been both blog and channel that have suffered.  It’s been some 3 months since Hurricane Maria and about a month and a half since I’ve been stateside.  This time has been filled with work and spending time with loved ones, the latter being some of the best kind of healing.  I recently even hosted an early Christmas supper {blog to come} since J won’t be here for the actual one, or for New Years for that matter {more on that below}.  I stay in touch with my island fam as much as I can but many phones are not working and some of my friends still have no power.  It’s strange to be back, especially within the circumstances that thrust us back here.  Life is so completely different here than back on our little rock and it’s been an adjustment.  2 years and I’m an island girl for life.

My husband flew back yesterday with urgent projects and obligations that needed his attention and until we find a more permanent place to live and promise of electricity, along with working internet and phone, I have decided to continue my work here.  This may mean we will be apart for an undetermined amount of time which in itself has caused us anxiety these past few weeks.  We spent our last day together doing some of his favorite things like enjoying lunch at his favorite restaurant, watching the new Star Wars and wandering the hardware store aisles, along with a few necessary errands wedged in between.  Right before his airport drop off, he said goodbye to my parents and somehow, we ended up in the middle of a parking lot, as the sun was setting, absorbing my father’s prayers and blessings as we all clutched hands, tearing up.

Babe, I am so incredibly proud of you.  

From my MIL’s sitting room – a snap of us when we met, 5 years ago.

Good omens abound.  It’s what surrounded our wedding, our move to St. Croix and these moments where we embark on yet another evolution.

I am still getting my head straight and will refine my video objectives soon.  Until then, I will be working diligently on new blog posts to go live a couple times a week.  As always, thank you for being here.

It’s been surreal being back in Charlotte.  It’s where my husband and I spent most of our lives {funny enough, in the same circles but never quite meeting until we finally did}.  The moment we were served drinks on the plane, I stared in disbelief at the ice in my cup which just a day before I had been waiting in line for.  Several places would even regularly run out completely and here I was, sitting in an air-conditioned seat with attendants pouring drinks…with ice!

Charlotte has been a shock to my system.  The pace, the vibe, the energy is all so very different.  I had become so acclimated to island life.  Of course the grocery store was my very first pit stop and I just looked over at my brother, shaking my head.  It was overwhelming how much there was to look at.  Sparkly aisles brimming with 6 different types of gluten free sprouted bread or pumpkin spice everything.  I had forgotten.

I will say, it’s been wonderful to spend quality time with both family and friends I haven’t seen in 2 years.  My heart is still with St. Croix and I communicate with those that have a working cell phone often.  However, there are some people we can’t get a hold of at all.  Things seem to be getting better day by day but on island time. We spent the first few days assembling care packages for those in need on both Puerto Rico and St. Croix.  My stateside friends, particularly my wonderful sister friend has raised funds and coordinated efforts to raise even more awareness.

The force of Maria reunited us with our loved ones and for that, I am grateful.  I’ve been spending long days in the kitchen with my mother and breaking bread with our loved ones.  I’ve allowed myself to get lost in all of the colorful markets that Charlotte has to offer and we even spent Halloween feeling young again.  We danced the night away and once again, we were just two souls, in love, really feeling each other.  For all of these things, I am grateful, but…

St. Croix, I miss you.

And here’s how we spent it.

Brunch

Coffee

Picking pumpkins

Feeding animals

And eating lots of daddy’s favorite seafood.  {This is what 5 lbs of shrimp, 4 lbs of mussels, 5 dozen clams, and 3 dozen oysters look like}.

Happy birthday, daddy!

I love you from the bottom of my heart.

Love,

Your Soogee

The moment we left home and started driving away, I started bawling.  Like a baby.  I’ll be 29 in 3 months and there I was.  Bawling.

It’s been nearly 2 weeks now and it still hasn’t quite sunk in but we’re just about settled in and I’m enjoying the slow pace of the island.  Everyone I meet eagerly offers me their own explanation of being on “island time.”  Will my staunch type-a personality ever allow me to fully immerse myself in this philosophy?  All I know is that natures seems to prevail over what suburbia flaunted with a concrete jungle filled with high rises.  I’m spending almost all of my time outdoors and swallowing all the natural beauty that surrounds me.  Though my heart aches for my family, the sea swirled with shock of blue sky can’t be bad for my soul.

The inlet where we went shrimping, the view home from the grocery store, a turtle in our driveway, and an alligator down the road.

Mama’s parting gift {mugwort rice cakes}.  Thank you mama!

With my plaque at Charlotte’s “30 under 30” right before the move.

Daddy’s Father’s Day low country boil: crab, bbq clams, mussels, shrimp, corn, potatoes, caesar salad, banana pudding, and squid jerky gift bags

Our first meal in our new home: roasted broccoli, grass-fed ribeye, and garlic mashed potatoes.

New videos will be posted next week!

Love,

Your Squishy Monster ^.~

Last week, I found myself at familiar places and those not so much.  The Charlotte community is opening up and developing a taste for foods that fall so neatly into the “ethnic” food category.  Why must they be considered “ethnic” anyways?  Aren’t we all about cultural pluralism?  Aren’t we supposedly a melting pot?  Hm…

I always think it’s funny when I walk down the “international aisle” which really just consists of a sprinkling of Goya or those unmistakable ruby bottles of Sriracha.  Consequently, I must venture off to a second store to obtain my Korean groceries, but I’m optimistic that this won’t always be the case.

Here’s my food line up for last week (end):

Mama’s Soybean Soup, Galbi, Tofu, and Korean Radish.  YUM!

Crawfish étouffée, extra spicy please.

Spicy Salmon & King Crab Roll

Spicy Mediterranean Potatoes from a Jewish cafe that just opened across the street.  (I’ve been there 4 times since they’ve opened…shhhh)

Cuban Sandwich for lunch

Best Fish Tacos in town!

I also visited an Ethiopian place that I shudder to think about.  I can’t say based upon my experience if I enjoyed it or not but I decided not to share until I visit another one to make a better assessment.

I hope the rest of y’all had a delicious week (end).

A new video will be up this week

Love,

Your happy-belly-full Squishy Monster ^.~

Last night was the last night we all had together for at least another month.  However, I’m so happy to report that both brothers will be with me on my birthday next month.

We decided to bring Mom flowers and take her out to a movie last night.  We got the the most gigantic tub of popcorn possible, and tucked into a seat with the lights dimming, greasy with butter, I found myself smiling at the simple joys of life that I get to partake in with my family and honestly, that’s what I took away from this movie at the end:

It revolves around the world of 6 year old Hushpuppy who sees the world differently.  To her, everything is connected and she sees and feels more than some 12 or 24 year old’s I know.  This is what she’s learned through the people that guide her through her life in “Bathtub,” a place considered unworthy of inhabiting (she was literally born on the wrong side of the levy in the southern part of Louisiana where flooding is imminent and everyone lives in heaps of trash).  She doesn’t know her mother and only has her father who’s health is rapidly declining.  Eventually, they are all seized by government agencies and placed in a shelter/refuge to which Hushpuppy remarks in defiance to being “rescued,” “is like a fish tank without water.”

Despite her father’s ailing health, it is he who teaches her all about resilience and strength through the utter collapse of everything she’s ever known.  “[Without him] I wouldn’t even be Hushpuppy.  I’d just be breakfast.”  It would be the easier road to take a quick glance at Hushpuppy’s world and cringe.  After all, it is just so “uncivilized,” but it goes back to grade school when we were taught all about societal norms and what is proper and what is not.  Hushpuppy don’t care–at the tender age of 6, she feels the delicate balance of life and understands survival and the acceptance of natures will to bend or break.  Sure, they’re social outcasts and live an irregular life but they have an abundance of love, understanding, (and food)!…  (haha, that’s all I need too, Hushuppy)!!

“The whole universe depends on everything fitting together just right. If one piece busts, even the smallest piece… the whole universe will get busted…Everybody loses the thing that made them. The brave men stay and watch it happen. They don’t run…When it all goes quiet behind my eyes, I see everything that made me flying around in invisible pieces.”

After our bellies were full of

Tortas for lunch

Korean Pancakes with Shrimp & Chives (center) …and left to right: Kimchi, Korean Radish, sautéed Eggplant, Royal Fern, Zucchini and Pancake Dipping Sauce

Kimchi Fried Rice

and Tiramisu for dessert (with Mama’s new Orchid).

After dinner, my bestie took us all out for “bon voyage” drinks.

“Here’s to another amazing adventure!”

CHEERS!

XOXO

Your Squishy Monster ^.~

As today is Memorial Day, it serves as a neon-highlighted reminder that an estimated 144,842 Veterans spent at least one night in an emergency shelter or transitional housing program in a recent year.  Perhaps some of the Men I met yesterday are disabled Veterans.  I can’t even begin to imagine the hell on earth that these brave Men and Women must be thrust into each day.  The people I met yesterday + Kids I saw late night, prove just how easy it is for them to be forgotten about.  It all comes down to how we, as Humans react and respond.

I pray that Frank caught that big fish and that he is OK.  Maybe I’ll see him again next Sunday.

‘Til tomorrow, I bid y’all a short goodbye and a Happy Memorial Day.

XOXO

Your Squishy Monster

If you’re looking for a BB cream review or a sandy peach lipstick swatch, sorry to disappoint.  These are just a few shots of things that I found beauty in this past week.

This is the winner–hands down.  As I slipped past them, it was, without a faltering moment that I decided that I must immortalize this in my iphone.  It literally brought tears to my eyes.  One day, I’m going to find this and have it for myself

Heirloom babies to make into tomato sammies.  Yum.

Fresh lychees to snack on in the car and dribble sticky juice all over yourself and not be able to find a napkin.  Yup.  That’s me.

Berries growing in my besties backyard!

Can you put a price on pleasure?  For $6, you can experience the dark chocolate cardamom sort.

A piece of Heaven (I’m certain).  I picked up The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath (apparently, it wasn’t depressing enough the first time around).

The thing here to notice is his pack.  The poor thing is so damn old that it’s literally splitting at the seams.  I stuck my hand in to fish something out to see if he’d notice, just to be funny.  You’ll be happy to know that it’s since been retired.  Silly hippie college kids today.

The sky is angry but the tall grass is begging you to play.

So intense!

The city right before the skirts and the heels come out to play.

What’s something beautiful you saw or experienced this week?

XOXO

your wondering what that cute old couple is doing,

Squishy Monster

Late last night, my bestie and I were craving something sweet and ducked into the only spot we knew that would be serving French Pastries at 3 am.

Completely engrossed in my bright sugary medley of things, I didn’t notice the man stomping out into the atrium who’s sole job was to yell, apparently. I almost peed in my pants (sorry for TMI). At 3 am on a Wednesday, the bakery is pretty empty and quiet anyways and I was comfortably perched on my padded chair, with my plate, tucked in a corner alone, waiting for my friend to come back with Tea. “Get up, I’m calling the Cops!” he’s yelling. It then struck me that behind me, hunched over in booths, were clumps of Kids, here and there, obviously homeless. They sat, staring back at this man, clutching their tattered packs, hoods stretched over their heads, wearing not the look of insolence or aggression but fatigue, weariness. Quicker than you can say “overpriced cookie,” they were gone and I was left with a nibbled plate of cookies and sadness. 

Where will they sleep tonight?  tomorrow?  the day after?  Where is their Family?  Do they have Family?  Are they worried, are they looking for them?  What do they eat?  Are they well?  What happens when it thunderstorms like it did on Tuesday?

I always have a bag of non perishables that I carry around in my car to give to the homeless man at that busy intersection that no one seems to have time to pause at.  Too busy.  I volunteer.  Obviously, that’s not enough.  I didn’t receive a culinary degree.  I went to school for Psychology and Human Services.  Part of my graduation requirements were to maintain a year long service internship at the local Ministry.  Sure, there’s a pile of second hand clothing to wear and lots of canned food to eat.  I didn’t get a chance to talk to these Kids last night…was it drugs?  abuse?  I don’t know, but they’re falling through the cracks.  The Ministry I was at was like most.  They do the best they can but can’t keep up with the demand.  There’s a vicious cycle that’s being perpetuated and it’s the Kids that are suffering.  Angelina Jolie can’t adopt all of them.

I’ll keep doing what I can.  I hope you do too.

I think I’ll start making my sack lunches for the initiative I headed a long time ago.  I wonder why I ever stopped.  (I got too absorbed in me, I suppose).  It was called “Pack Away Hunger.”  50 sack lunches with an inspiring message, uptown, every Sunday.  Once, I discovered two teens hiding out in an abandoned building.  Life comes at you so hungrily that you forget I forgot, that it’s not just about Squishy’s or Monster’s.  I’ll be sure to update y’all about Sundays, “Pack Away Hunger.”

I just hope that they know that they are loved.

Be grateful for all that you have.  Your Mother was right.  There are people out there with nothing.

Blessed and hoping to share my blessings,

Your Squishy Monster

Strawberry Lemonade Salt Water Taffy, that is.

Another thing that made me smile today?

The Mister at check out who gave me a  sticker that smelled of Coffee.  That was pretty awesome.  (Did anyone collect puffy stickers as a kid, cos those were a close second to scratch and sniff)!

I took what I bought at the Market and made Shrimp Curry for the Family.  Pink Argentinian Shrimp smashed with pungent heaps of Chili, Lemongrass, Ginger, Garlic, Coriander…and if ever, I can collect the ingredients on paper, resembling anything close to an organized list, I promise to do a video on it.

Total score for the triple coupon event.  6 “simply” Juices, a Papaya, Bananas, and 6 boxes of Raisinets for $4.  I had six $.50 coupons and six $.75 coupons and each tripled itself which left me to pay for just the balance of Fruit.  Yummy winning!

More yummy winning:

1/4 Dark with Rasta Rice + Potato Salad + Corn Bread at my favorite Caribbean spot where there are only 4 tables, the bathroom is so close you can hear the water running and nothing is actually cooked when you order it.  They microwave it right in front of you minus no blatant shame and I wouldn’t be so forgiving except it’s so damn good.  Sometimes, I can make a concession for deliciousness.

Ah, safely coiled on my couch, I can now hear the rain fall.  When I was little, Reading Rainbow provided me endless comfort in telling me that thunder was just the sound of Angels bowling.

Funny, because that’s what it still reminds me of

Coloring Monday Blues (and grey skies) into Pink and Yellow Strawberry Lemonade

Love,

Your Squishy Monster